Never Counted the Days
by hermghp
Summary: Concealed thoughts lead to hidden secrets that should have been told, to someone or something. Hermione Granger is pensive after graduation, remembering and questioning all her actions. She has everything now, but somehow she needs something more.
1. Chapter 1

She was standing looking at the droplets of water down the big window. Hermione Granger was staying with her parents for the Holidays and the peaceful scene of her in that corner of the house was betrayed by all the thoughts of turmoil going through her mind. 

So what was to happen next, school was over and she though she wanted to be an Auror, but she wanted something different. A vacation maybe? More time with her family?

"What's wrong Hermione dear?" Hermione's mom came in the drawing room looking for her.

"Tea is served and Madeline made pineapple and strawberry pastries, will you come?"

"Yeah, in a minute, I'm cold; I'll just go up-stairs and get a sweater." She turned her head facing her mother.

"Are you OK?" Her mother asked, a curious expression crossing her face.

"I'm fine mom; I love pineapple and strawberry pastries." She gave a weak smile and exited the drawing room with her mother.

* * *

Now wrapped in a red sweater and adding honey to her English Breakfast tea, her mother was chatting about some ballet she wanted to attend with her before she left to The Burrow again.

"Is that in your plans dear?"

"Hum, what? Hum, I haven't decided yet mother…"

"Are you really OK? You've been distant today."

"I'm sorry mother, but yes… I'll love to go to the ballet with you."

"I see you received a letter, is it from your friends?"

"Yeah, from Ron."

"Oh, well, though it was from Harry." In a fleeting memory comeback Hermione remembered she had not told her mother about Ron. They were seeing each other now. For a long time she had taken it for granted but never sent word to her parents about it.

"Mom, I have to tell you something, I just remembered."

"What is it?" She put her chamomile and mint mug down and looked at her expectantly.

"Ron and I have been going out for quite some time now, I know it's a surprise, and I should have told you ages ago, but it honestly went by, like that. I'm sorry I didn't tell you before."

"Oh, Ron…" Her mother digested the news and Hermione could almost hear the two pastries she ate, having a difficult time passing through.

"Have you liked him for a long time?" Her mother had her hands on her lap; she then leaned back on her chair, never blinking in waiting of her daughter's response. Hermione was holding her letter firmly and the parchment was beginning to crumple, suddenly she just wanted to take off her sweater and dismiss the situation altogether as a joke.

"Yes mom, for a long time, but it was my thoughts, I didn't feel like sharing them with anyone, sorry for that. Never thought it would actually come to be as I wanted."

"Well, you are every smart and beautiful, why not?" Hermione laughed, entertained by her mother's naïve remark, she was getting old after all.

"Yes mom, but that can be precisely intimidating for men."

She was careful not to say "Ron" instead of men, as that would put her boyfriend in a negative light. She put the letter on the table and took her sweater off. She left it to one side of the next chair and took a sip of her tea, it was warm now, and the conversation had made it so. She looked at her mother, she was still silent.

"Is it that big a shock? Come on! Ron is not that bad, he really is wonderful and I'm very happy. Have you ever had to think twice about my good judgment mother?"

"Oh, well, sorry, I thought it would be you and Harry who would end up together… You talk about him more than you do Ron!"

"Oh, please… That's just… well he's Harry Potter!" Hermione felt strange in describing her great friend like this; he was a hero, but she sometimes forced herself not to put Harry on a pedestal for all his achievements, then trying to put Ron for his petty ones, in comparison or course. She had to stop being a bitch in her thoughts!

"Well, he is a good boy and I hope it goes well."

"Yeah, me too, we're really close." Hermione said this while thinking: "Goes well? God, that's encouragement!"

_

* * *

_

_Dear Hermione,_

_I hope you're having a great holiday with your parents, you haven't written in more than a week, is everything OK? Well I was surprised at your last letter, it was kind of short. Everything is well here in The Burrow, I'm going through my trunk, I've never done that. You would be surprised at all the things I found, things I lost during my first year. I know that would probably repulse you, but it's just stuff, nothing that used to be alive or of the sort. Harry is spending lots of time helping around the house and we've been playing Quiditch with Ginny. I don't think he is too comfortable staying here, I think he'd rather have his own place now that school is over, but until he gets a job, he'll be living with us. When will you be visiting? I hope soon. Please write._

_Love_

_Ron_

Hermione read the letter just once and placed it in one of the drawers in her desk. She was really feeling sluggish as hell, but sat down and started writing Ron. She paused a few times, staring out her window at the dieing day. She had a full view of her small back yard; oddly enough it had a huge tree that looked like a thorn plucking the earth, its branches reminding her of her impossible hair.

_Dear Ron,_

_Sorry for not sending word in along time dear, I've missed you too. I think I'll be staying longer with my family; I haven't done so in these past years. I feel I need to know them again. You will be surprised but I told my mother about us today. I know what you must be thinking, it just left my mind. She was mildly surprised and approved happily. Not much is going on; mother and I are going to a ballet presentation soon. In regards of Harry, well I guess he thinks he has been using your family's hospitality for way to long, all these years and the situations that came to pass. Of course, like all of us, he wants to find his feet, meet new people and maybe travel? I'm glad all is well with you and your trunk._

_Yours truly_

_Hermione_

As a graduation present Ron had given her an owl, she named the creature Roberta, thought it was amusing. It was a gray owl, full grown and very quiet, very much to her liking. She wanted to be alone of late and enjoyed her parents' companionship. Her thoughts wondered to Ron and the last days they spent in Hogwarts. She had lost her virginity, in a classroom, very passionate, but uncomfortable.

It had been a dreary day outside; she had though summer would never come. Strangely Ron had taken her by the hand and pulled her out of the common room and her vivid studying. They walked and joked for a long time around the castle and then Ron went inside an empty classroom with her. She thought it was another touchy feely kissing session, but as it turned out, it was not.

She loved feeling Ron's hard cock rub against her, especially when he was hugging her from behind and kissing her neck, while massaging her breasts. She pressed her body against his and they both moaned together. She raised one of her hands and entwined it in his flaming hair. It was long now, he had let it grow for the past year and a half and it framed his face, softening his harsh features.

And then it all happened in a flash, he had lifted her skirt and pulled down her underwear, she could feel his naked genitals rubbing against her. She always got wet when they kissed ands touched, so everything was for the taking. He bent her down on a desk, pushing her towards it very gently. By instinct she parted her legs; she was confused, but turned on. She trusted and loved Ron a lot so she just relaxed as best she could.

He started by rubbing his extent along her swollen vagina, she loved it. His hands were firmly on her hips and then he pronounced that he loved her, in almost a whisper. Just after that he thrust his dick inside her, it hurt so much and she screamed. Ron looked at the door, got his wand and put a closing charm on it, and then he cast a silencing charm in the room.

Hermione was grabbing the desk with all her force; he continued to fuck her in a steady pace, not stopping or having mercy on her pain. Then after a minute or two the pain resided slowly and it began to feel very good and very tight. She was moaning loudly now and Ron picked up the pace and she loved it.

Her body was beginning to protest in discomfort, but she felt she couldn't't do anything. Ron then pulled out, Hermione stood up, her hair messier than ever from all the to and fro motion. He turned her around and asked her to sit on the desk, she wrapped her legs around his waist and they started at it again.

If it wasn't for Ron she would fall and hurt herself badly, she was again in discomfort, but Ron made it up, not only by plucking her dearly of her maidenhood, but by kissing her on the neck, ears, sucking madly at her lips, altogether alternating with tight hugs.

Suddenly he pulled out and came on her vagina, it was warm, but then it went all sticky and Hermione smiled awkwardly at him. He got his wand and produced a cleaning charm. She suddenly realized with a painful bang that Ron had already done this before; she felt an animal pang of hate towards Lavender Brown. She should have acted sooner, been bolder, like a true Gryffindor.


	2. Chapter 2

"Get down dear, please! Crookshanks! I said now!" A shrilly Hermione voice was screaming in desperation outside. Her cat had no business down there in the human terrain and was quite comfortable on the lowest branch of the tree. Still, not even with a high ladder could Hermione reach him.

"God! You tire me! Whatever!" Hermione was now inside, sweaty and irritable, she heard Madeline humming happily in the kitchen. She went inside it, grabbed a napkin and blew her nose in disdain.

"As you say to me sometimes, and I don't know why, what has your wand in a knot?" Madeline laughed and kept on smiling and humming away.

"I'm making quiche Lorain today for tea and donuts, want to know what's for dinner?" She looked at Hermione pleasantly knowing that the young woman's bad mood would soon evaporate with the mention of the quiche.

"What?" Hermione tossed the napkin in the rubbish bin and crossed her arms, not without looking around, trying to look for the quiche.

"It's still in the oven child, and I'm making steak and kidney pie, haven't made that since you last came here in the summer. If you ask me you have been vacationing way too long. You graduated almost six months ago… What ya gonna do child with all your magic training?"

Hermione was quite stricken with her maid's outburst of opinion. She only did it once in a while, like the steak and Yorkshire pudding. And when she did she struck deep.

"I haven't asked you Madeline. I'm still thinking of what to be, you know… I have lots of options and I'm good at many things…" Hermione said all this hurtfully.

"I mean not to offend you dear, but please don't sit on your arse all day, it is not becoming of your nature."

"But…"

"Now child, what are your options?" Hermione looked at her scornfully, her temperature rising more and more, but she knew this would help. This is what she needed, a guide. She was tired of knowing everything.

"Well I could be Auror, that's sort of a policeman with high rank and respect, very hard to achieve. Then there is Healer, which is the equivalent of a doctor. I could easily get a good internship in the Ministry of Magic. What else? Let me see…" Hermione was deep in thought.

"Well choose the more challenging one, you are good at that. And at the same time one that pays good, they all sound hectic jobs to me."

"Yeah… they all are."

"What is that boyfriend of yours going to do?"

"No idea… Hey! How did you know about Ron?"

"Ron? Thought it was Don… My ears must be failing me now."

"Listening to conversations are we now Madeline?"

"Maybe you should go upstairs; there is a letter for you, but not from Don… I mean Ron... But from that Harry fellow you speak so much of."

Hermione didn't even reply and was flying up the stairs to her bedroom. Roberta was there with a small parchment tied to her leg.

_Dear Hermione,_

_I will be visiting you Wednesday night, Aparating exactly. I need to talk to you._

_Harry_

How eloquent of him, she thought. Wednesday was today, she felt excited that her friend was coming, they could have dinner and he could meet Madeline. She went to her closet and selected this beautiful yellow floral printed dress her father had brought her from America on a trip he made.

She didn't know how he had selected such a dress, it was very light, and he usually brought her sweaters and very cliché souvenirs, the kind you only get at airports. Oh well it will have to do.

"Why so beautiful dear?" Hermione's mom was surprised that her daughter had put so much care in her looks this evening. She had surely grown to be a beautiful lady.

"Oh, I just felt like putting this dress on." Hermione's dad was stuffing himself as usual; it was high season for the dentists that wanted to work. Many went away for Christmas and her parents took the opportunities of many patients with dying dental aches and other mouth maladies.

"You look lovely, a young woman, I'm very proud" Hermione sighed and thanked her mother for the compliment. Dinner went my, it was already 10 o'clock and Harry hadn't come. She was taking her jewelry off in her room; the light from her bathroom was the only one on. Then she heard the distinct sound of Aparating.

"Hermione" Harry was still under his invisibility cloak; he then took it off in a flash and was folding it without care and looking at her in the low fluorescent light.

"Harry, you're here, thought you were coming for dinner…" Hermione went over to him, they hugged briefly and separated.

"No… I didn't want to disturb, I just needed some time away."

"Away from the Weasley's you mean?" Hermione was closing her bedroom door as to not make Harry's presence known.

"Well…" Harry now sat on her bed looking around, he was curious at the surroundings; he had never been in Hermione's house before.

"I understand… how's everything with Ginny?" Hermione took off her brown boots and put on her pink fluffy slippers she got last Christmas.

"Well, to put it bluntly, we can't be alone… ever… Ron is always around and…" Harry looked tremendously uncomfortable talking about this. His body, now a back shadow with blue light reflecting on it from behind, made Hermione pity him a bit.

"You want to get close to her and you can't" Hermione could read his expression from years of practice; there were no secrets between them.

"Yes… that…"

"I get it Harry"

"Have you and Ron, you know, got to that point?"

"We have, but only once."

"OK… Sorry for the personal question. I'm just frustrated."

"You're horny Harry, its normal."

"Hermione…"

"What?"

"Show me" Hermione looked at him confused as ever, show him what?

"What?" Harry now took her hand and pulled her towards him; she was befuddled and just didn't know what to do.

"Yeah, you know what I mean… I know you like me. You love Ron, but you like me. And I'm sure I could've fucked you better than he did."

"Are you mad? Are you… Harry? Is this joke? I can't believe it!"

"Why are you wearing that dress Hermione?"

"I… huh…"

"Let me do it to you my friend, let me just be with you… for once."


	3. Chapter 3

The daylight was vivid; the curtains had not been drawn before she went to sleep, or rather, went to bed. In a blaze she remembered last night's events; she turned over and looked at Harry still asleep, the point of his wand sticking behind the pillow. She blushed liberally committing to memory what he did, not only with his "_wand_", but also with his wand...

Strangely Hermione Granger did not feel mortified, just worried, of having sex with her boyfriends' best friend. Well, he was also _her_ best friend. She looked at him and lust crept her body. Hermione with a pang of remorse remembered what Harry said last night. He said he could have fucked her better than Ron. Well, it was just different, as in _virgin_ different.

Lavender fucked Ron, Ron fucked her and she fucked Harry... One Happy family. She laughed sarcastically and Harry shifted in his bed, she quieted and decided to just lay there thinking of all the ways, of all the times that that Brown bitch fucked her guy. What a fraud she was being now, claiming Ron as her own and then fucking their best friend.

"Oh well! Such is life after graduation" she thought. "What are you thinking about with that grin on your face?" Harry had turned his head and surprised Hermione with the question.

"The amusing situation we're in Harry, that's all..."

"Amusing? I'd say screwed up!"

"Never hear you say the F word before last night..." Hermione quoted with her hands. He just laughed and hugged her, positioning his head on her shoulder.

"its ok you know, it'll only be this once..."

"I don't know"

"What do you mean? You want this to continue?"

"I said I don't know..."

They both came as one, kissed for a long time, slowly... Harry mounted her and rubbed his dick on her clit. She was rowdily wet now. Then Harry started kissing her lower abdomen, massaging her thighs. In a flash he opened her legs wide and went down on her. 

"Lick it Harry, yeah! Oh!" Hermione was in a wild frenzy. He was sticking three fingers inside her and wiping his warm tongue in her flaming bud. She could feel the bed sheets lightly damp now. Harry abruptly stopped and kneeled, he started masturbating. His dick was hard and fair in color. His member was different somehow to Ron's, Hermione then saw he had been circumcised, Ron had not. Probably not a wizard practice she thought. Harry then directed his shaft to her pussy and came on it, covering it like the first snow of Christmas. 

And then Hermione woke up to Harry's voice, she was still wearing her yellow dress beneath the blankets and thanked Merlin that it was pitch black in her room. Underneath she was spread wide open and had exactly three fingers inside her vagina, the other massaging her breast.

"Hermione... You OK there? Were you having a bad dream?"

"Uh, I guess..."

"Let me put some light..."

"No! It's fine," but it was too late, Hermione quickly composed herself and was out of bed in seconds.

"Why are you wearing that dress Hermione?" Hermione froze and looked at him terrified.

"Are you OK Hermione, is something wrong?"

"Na... I mean... Yeah, just give me a minute, need to go to the toilet for a while."

"Can I sit down?"

"Yes, yes, there, the desk over there" she said while pointing at her huge library desk made of old oak.

Hermione grabbed some jeans and a t-shirt from her wardrobe really fast. She darted for the toilet outside her room and closed the door, and then she gave a huge intake of breath and a sigh to accompany it. She looked around and was terrified of what she saw in the mirror. Her hair was all in disarray from the neat ponytail she had done before. Her eyeliner was smudged and she was a bit sweaty, not too mention her insides. She needed a quick shower.

"You took a long time"

"I'm so sorry Harry, what time is it?"

"Almost two o'clock"

"Why so late? I was expecting you around dinner time"

"For real Hermione! Ron would ask too many questions if I just paid you a visit at dinner time, especially in his house, not to mention Ginny."

"I see, didn't think much about it..."

"That's a first one for you..."

"Jaja, very funny Potter..." they both laughed and then Hermione sat on her messed up bed and looked at him questionly.

"So... you wanted to talk about something..."

"It's about Voldemort..."

"Voldemort? He's dead Harry... I saw you kill him..."

"It's not that, it's this sense of security that is so foreign to me... I've always had this impending danger bug in my head, when I sleep, live... but now there is nothing. All is safe, and I know that's good, but it just seems strange and I'm not me..."

"Not you? Well I can see it somehow. Well, maybe you need to suppress it, you know… I never told you or Ron, but I have a diary. Yes… I know you may not be particularly fond of them, but it works. You write everyday, your thoughts and feelings. Then after a month you re read everything and you discover the problem, the pattern if there is one."

"A diary? Can I see it?"

"No, it's very personal, I mean you write everything. Things that not even your best mates can read. We sometimes need something to let go completely…"

"Let go completely… mmm… yes… I just feel so confused…"

"Tell me about it!"

"What?"

"Yeah, I mean even I don't have it figured out yet… Everything… You know…"

"Yes I know…"

"God, I can't imagine having this conversation with Ron… it would be ridiculous…"

"Bet he'd be interested in reading your Diary too…"

"As if"

"No really, he would… He seems to miss you a lot…"

"Yeah… that… I know…"

"I think you've forgotten, he may have the emotional range of a teaspoon, but you occupy most of it…"

"What, ja! Really Harry, were did you get that one from?"

"Don't be an asshole Hermione; he just loves you too much for his own good"

"Harry, I can't believe this… You think I don't love Ron only because I don't write to him constantly. You know you're not the only one confused or whatever. You may have had a lot of complications and problems in the past, but that doesn't mean mine or anybody else's problems are less important, get a God damn clue!"

"I think I should go…"

"What?"

"Goodbye Miss Masturbation, it looks like you need Ron here after all…"


	4. Chapter 4

"What is it Hermione? You are just playing with your food this morning?" Madeline admonished.

"Nothing, I just… I don't feel hungry, I'm going outside…"

"But… Whatever…" Madeline looked at her effort at a good meal just left there like an unwanted present.

Hermione was beneath her tree, she looked up, being annoyed at her bad mood and her bad judgment.

"OK, this always helps"

_I'm sure everybody has sexual dreams, but mine just seem to manifest themselves in small doses of late..._

_I know what I want to be, it's a Healer. I'd be helping people and be in a relatively safe environment. No more adventure crap for me. Enough with being fighting Voldemort, starving myself and guarding a cursed lock, all while being in the wilderness, plus almost being killed a few times. In writing it seems like something to remember fondly, but it really wasn't for me. I kept my duty as a Gryffindor and as a friend and a fighter for the cause, but of late I want to find myself alone. Find my own value in doing it myself, not having "a team" behind me._

_Harry is bound to be an Auror and Ron to work in the Ministry, I'm sure his dad can get both of them the quick connections. I want to start from zero, and this career offers lots of study and interaction with people that want my help. I've made up my mind, I can't wait to tell Ron, Harry, my parents and of course dear Madeline, who would be delighted and relieved that I've chosen my course._

_I had quite an embarrassing situation and a huge discussion with Harry last night. I was masturbating quite energetically, like never before, and that's when he decided to drop in. He wanted to talk; apparently he is in an "early life crisis" dilemma, more than me anyway. Voldemort might have left all the worlds in this reality, muggle and magical alike, but not his mind. I'm pretty pissed off at him, acted like a total imbecile. Accusing me of not paying enough attention at Ron for the time being, well with all honesty, I really don't want to._

_I want to be by myself for some time. I miss that a lot. Changing subject I totally had a crazy dream with Harry, I mean it's happened before, as with many guys, but I mean, it's only my dreams. They will never count, they don't matter. They are just dreams, they are nargles. I heard even Padma Patil say once that we are all a little bi at times. I've hardly felt that, maybe to Ginny, but that's maybe because I've hanged out with her so much. I guess the company of two males as my best friends did affect me. I think I know what must be done._

Hermione shut her diary; she had bought a blank thick papered notebook and decorated it herself with pieces of papers she found, wraps of muggle and wizard candies, pictures, magazine a periodical cuts that interested her. It was by far the most artistic and freeing thing she had ever done. She was always thinking proper, clean, and reasonable. This was her outlet. She regretted telling Harry about her diary and she wondered why Ron had not written back yet.

Hermione put her head back on the trunk, it was hard and not very comfortable, but it gave her peace to look up at the high branches and the gray winter sky. Where was Crookshanks now?

"Hermione, I need a word with you" Ron put down his quill and sat up. The common room was warm and not too many people were in it, just enough to make it pleasant.

"Yes, what is it Ron?" Hermione stopped writing to, expecting it would just be a question regarding his assignment.

"It's about when I left you and Harry in the tent, when we were on the run…" Ron looked at her apprehensively, worried she would dismiss the situation as past.

There was a big pause of them looking at eachother, Ron reached for her hand, "What about it?"

"I never got to say how sorry I was that I left you guys, that I left you…" He squeezed her hand gently and she reached for his other hand to, smudging her assignment a bit.

Hermione's eyes were watery now and all the common room disappeared and there was nothing but Ron. "Oh Ron… it's OK…. I've…"

"Maybe, but I don't want it to come up later, it really was terrible, right at that moment was the test of friendship I owed Harry from that time I also bailed on him on the Triwizard Tournament"

"Ron, please…" A single tear streamed down Hermione's cheek, she smiled at him and lunged for his neck and they both hugged dearly for along time. Little they noticed they were giving the rest of the Gryffindors a little amusing bit of love entertainment. They broke off slowly and looked around, quickly composing them selves.

"Hermione I really do love you, for ages I have…really…"

"I know…"

Hermione opened her eyes, remembering were she was, the cold afternoon creeping inside her layers of clothes.

"Hermione dear, come inside… Some of that quiche from yesterday is being served with tea… it's so cold out here, come inside and warm yourself…" Hermione's dad was looking at her curiously, and then spotted her diary.

"Yes" standing up from the roots of the tree, "I guess that'll be a good idea dad…"

Inside it was very warm; Hermione welcomed the sensation of her home with glee. Christmas was approaching. Her family stopped being Christian exactly since they knew of the existence of magic and thought it better to become Pagans, and actually found out that this holiday had Pagan roots. Madeline of course would not hear of it herself, but she loved and respected their views anyway.

"English Breakfast?" Madeline handed her the usual, but she rejected. "No Madeline" Hermione said, "I want something new".

"What dear?" Her mother sounded surprised, Hermione had always taken English Breakfast tea, _always_.

"Do you have something else?"

"Oh, well… I'll go to the kitchen and fetch the other flavors…" Madeline turned away slowly looking at both parents with a curious smile.

"Oh please such a reaction over tea! Well I guess it's because of my decision"

"What decision dear?" Her mother said with a bit of a worried expression.

"Healer! That's it! That's what I want to be. It's the equivalent of being a doctor here, that's what I will study and be!"

"Oh love! That is fantastic!" Her dad stood up and Hermione did also, they both embraced.

"Too bad you will not be a dentist!"

"Yes, well still a doctor!" Hermione said smiling. When she sat back again her mother took her hands and smiled broadly.

"I'm so proud, it'll be great, and I know you will be great too!"

"Mom… Oh Madeline! Wow! That is a big selection of tea! Never new you had so much…"

"Well I drink a lot of it, so I have a few…"

Hermione was now full of quiche Lorain and she was relaxing while sipping her imported Blood Orange tea.

"Refreshing" Hermione though after tasting it, the name quite intrigued her, she would have to research it. Then she looked at the simmering water in her cup and thought better for it. This was it; this would be the one thing she would not know about. Not know why it is called Blood Orange tea.

"Hermione" a voice said in the dark, she was half awake and then in that place between dreams and reality she realized who it was.

"Ron, what are you doing here?"


	5. Chapter 5

"So, it seems you missed me?"

"Don't be so smug Ron" Hermione was facing him, they were very close and their noses almost touched in togetherness.

Ron had waked her up and when she recognized him he gave her the sweetest peck on the lips. Her brown eyes met his blue ones and in a flash he took off his traveling cloak and shoes, then he was in bed with her.

Hermione was very surprised to see him, but in her years of trust and her love for him she let go to his kisses and his embrace. He parted his lips with his tongue slowly, but before he explored the inside of her mouth he sucked on her lips and she bit him lightly on his upper lip. He parted after a quick deep kiss and went over to her neck. At this point he was now on top of her, grinding, pushing his hips unto hers.

"Ron… "

"I so wished you lived with me, so we could be together… I miss you…"

"I know sweetie…"

"Can I stay?"

"Mmm, yes… you may"

The night died away and morning came, the light coming through her window a reminder her of her vivid dream with Harry and she woke up with a start, sat up and slowly looked at the lump beside her… Red hair… She breathed deeply and stood up. Once in the in front of the bathroom mirror she looked at herself, she looked healthy, cheeks slightly flushed, cherry lips and…

"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH! Oh my God! It's you! Don!" Madeline had entered Hermione's bedroom for cleaning and to wake her up for breakfast.

"Hermione! Come!" Ron was covering himself with the bed blankets and pointing his wand at Madeline from the start he gave him, thinking there was danger.

"Ron! Put that down! Now! Madeline!"

"Child, I can't believe…"

"Madeline, I hate to break it to you… but I'm not a child anymore"

Madeline was cooking breakfast silently, Hermione soundless, looking at her from her a seat in the kitchen table. It had snowed now and there was light outside, 11:23 AM to be exact. Ron had left the premises after Madeline bewildered at Hermione's remark had evacuated the room leaving the cleaning appliances behind. Ron had not waited for Hermione to ask, just a quick glance at each other and Hermione walked down with Madeline. She would write Ron a letter later on.

"Well, thank Merlin Dad and Mom weren't here…"

"Well it is their house…"

"Dear Madeline, I'm of age now, and I know I did wrong…"

"Yes you did, and as I said, it's their house and you need to respect… child…"

"Yes, well, I said I'm sorry and it won't happen again. Are you gonna tell them Madeline?"

"It's not my business, and well, you are of age now"

Madeline finally faced Hermione, handing her a hot bowl of porridge and a latte. Hermione ate up and went upstairs thanking Madeline for the breakfast. She sat on her bed, looked at it and just stayed there for the longest time. She took her Diary out and stated writing.

_I feel Madeline is right when she calls me child, it really doesn't bother me and I know that being me, it should. I'm not a child, but not knowing who I really want to be with makes me an undecided person, leading to vulnerable, that leads to immature. And I'm neither. I'm a witch now and I love it, it's the best time I've ever had, but somehow I miss the muggle word. Can I be part of both? This situation with my dreams and Ron, I'm starting to take his love for granted, like if I don't need to give back because I know it will always be there, and that's terrible. I've grown some hidden defects in my personality that is affecting my life. I need to get away. _

_Dear Ron, _

_Sorry for the morning greeting from my maid and sorry for not telling you I had a maid in the fist place. It just left my mind that she comes and wakes me up. I hope you didn't feel offended. I'd like to talk to you ASAP. _

_Yours truly _

_Hermione _

"Und dies sind einige Statuen aus der späten Römerzeit, Etruskische, um genau zu sein" the museum tour guide was saying, Hermione in a desperate attempt to understand German. She had quite progressed in the last two weeks, going up and down Germany. She had taken off, asked her parents for money and left. After speaking to Ron, then Harry and then saying goodbye to Ginny, she felt free. Not for a long time had she felt that, her spirit was again with her, not scattered all over the place. She was going to put her mess in order. Her parents quite approved of her traveling abroad, knowing Europe a little better never hurt anybody and they new she could take care of herself. They had done it as well when they were young and were happy to provide for anything she needed. 

"Hey? Sie wissen, wie spät es ist?" A young German man approached her; Hermione understood the word "time" and hesitantly showed him her watch. He smiled at her and _asked_ her if she spoke German.

"Sprechen Sie Deutsch?"

"English… Englisch…" Hermione tried to say the name of her native tongue with a more German accent. He nodded and they smiled. He had wild hair, tall and fair skin. They talked a little with his broken English, enjoying the tour and taking the occasional picture.

"You haf man, boyfriend…?"

"Well… No, I don't… And I'm good, for now…"

**The End**

_PLEASE REVIEW_


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